'Sonic the Hedgehog' looks to be an Abomination

By Derrick Jean-Baptiste

Being a Sonic fan is pain.

So the ‘Sonic the Hedgehog’ trailer was just released today and it looks horrendous. I always knew the film wasn’t going to be for me so I have never attempted to voice my disdain for this entire creative endeavor.

But now I can.

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I've never been more personally offended by a movie trailer. This looks like it was made by someone who doesn't even have a passing knowledge of Sonic. Sonic isn't a furry ball of lightning, nor is Eggman a reincarnation of Ace Ventura. I wish a thousand poxes on the creators of this abomination.

My least favorite thing from this trailer is Sonic’s itself. His facial animations make me feel ill, as if I'm looking at a Lovecraftian demon-god whose grotesque form the human mind is not able to fully comprehend without going insane. An obscene, godless abomination that should not exist, let alone star in a family movie.

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When the police officer shone the light on him my mind literally took a few moments to catch up with what my eyes just saw. It was as if one was gazing across the vast, uncaring void to witness something that, for just a moment, you recognize before your mind settles on the horrifying truth that whatever you are looking at is not something you've seen before.

You are not looking at something anyone has ever seen before.

You are looking at something that should never have been seen.